This started as a way to fight through the chaos and darkness. Music, Feminism, Photography, Art, and Idealism are common subject matter. Nature is God, Black Lives Matter, Love is ❤ Love, Socialism, Life is Mayhem, Queer To Stay!
Since The Beginning:
Monday, December 22, 2008
Yay for Updates
should update my other things...
love u all.
happy holidays.
-alae
Weird... .
~*~Alae~*~
Monday, December 15, 2008
very little time
i'd say more but someone else needs the comp...
have a happy holiday, whatever it may be...
*alae
very little time
i'd say more but someone else needs the comp...
have a happy holiday, whatever it may be...
*alae
12-6-08
my sister is going to be great tonite at the play she's in. it starts at 7... ugh and she has to walk there. it's a mile and it's snowing out as if it wasn't already cold enough out as it is. saturdays rock. point is. she'll be great. even if she is kinda, okay definitely, shaky on her lines.
she'll do great. and we all know it. even if the Director is a fucking whore-loving bitch who is full of herself to the point that i'd rather share company with all of my ex boyfriends in one room than just her. it'd be a lot less aggravating...
later,
alae ri rae ren
12-6-08
my sister is going to be great tonite at the play she's in. it starts at 7... ugh and she has to walk there. it's a mile and it's snowing out as if it wasn't already cold enough out as it is. saturdays rock. point is. she'll be great. even if she is kinda, okay definitely, shaky on her lines.
she'll do great. and we all know it. even if the Director is a fucking whore-loving bitch who is full of herself to the point that i'd rather share company with all of my ex boyfriends in one room than just her. it'd be a lot less aggravating...
later,
alae ri rae ren
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Dear Editor (my unsent letter)
Union City
Friday, November 7, 2008
YAWN
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
invisible like shadows in a faded light...
Monday, October 27, 2008
saturday
Friday, October 24, 2008
ri ri says hi hi
i have no service on my cell cuz of the weather. my friend had a baby so that's cool. but that's the only good thing. shout out to anyone who can figure out my favorite M-word. it isn't Monster or Mash btw. nor is it Mom... lol. no offense, ma.
i really need to get laid. excuse me while i scream....
ciao,
Ri
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
it's green today
on to the homecoming game. we lost with zero points. our players fell like Dominoes and it was humiliating and BORING.
total waste of 5$....
my head is spinning and i'm tired and i want pepperoni pizza dammit.
lol.
much love, alae
Monday, October 13, 2008
Tennessee
i got here though. yay to the stubburn people.
i am never wearing a skirt or dress again cuz my own mother said i dressed skanky. gee thanks. and if these memory flashes don't stop happening i may very well go completely nuts.
someone help me cuz i just want to scream right now.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Nothing Feels Right
the only good thing i can say so far is that i got off last night thinking about 'him'... and that it started raining lightly. thank goddess...
Monday, October 6, 2008
Halloween is coming...
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
SweetDreams-I love you (Count The Stars)
I dream at night for you. I wish you were here again…
CHORUS:
Your smile would make my day.
Your words would lift me higher.
You said- that I was pretty.
You said- that I was sweet.
Yeah, you can be kind of heady.
It’s true; you knock me off my feet.
I dream at night for you. I count the stars… I fell in love with you. You count the stars.
Chorus x1
When it rains, you think of me. And I dream of the “us” we never had a chance to be. You call me, just to say “sweet dreams”. I smile when you say “sweet”. Cuz you told me once, a long time ago, that “sweet dreams” meant “I love you” from you to me…
Chorus x1
Together we count the stars and laugh.
But when we dance, and you say “sweet dreams”…
I know there’s still a chance, ya mean you love me.
Fantasy
I wish I could tell you
How I love you always.
But you know it’s true
That I’m eternally filled with uncertainties.
My heart aches for somethin’.
I don’t know exactly what it is.
I find every day, myself wishin’.
I want rain and sunshine,
I want an ocean storm.
To try and be more than “fine”.
And that special someone to keep me warm.
That special someone to keep me warm.
I stare at the TV,
Not really seeing the screen.
I remember that first day you kissed me.
Now it’s all just a dream.
A mere memory…
Lost to the stars and lights.
Lost to me.
I’ll never understand why we still fight.
Guess it was all just a fantasy.
Forgotten In Time
Poor poor beautiful soul {x3}
Come find me. Poor poor beautiful soul, please see me.
Poor poor beautiful soul {x2}
Lost in the world. Poor poor beautiful soul forgotten in time.
Poor poor beautiful soul {x3}
Set me free. Poor poor beautiful soul, please free me.
Poor poor beautiful soul
Can’t you remember me?
Poor poor beautiful soul
Remember me. (x2)
Remember me in time.
the Write Guy
i keep hoping he'll get online today but i doubt he will. i want to tell him yes but by the time he gets online i'll probably be walking home.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Counting The Stars
u know he'll never know this but that's cuz i protect my emotions bigtime.
all i can say is that he makes me smile. that should say it all...
*Alae
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Princes & Frogs
secondly. i love it.
now. on to business, the important things. like what i want for winter solstice. lol.
New Stereo so i can listen to the radio, cds, and my cassettes.
MP3 player
flashdrive
Katy Perry CD
New Pink CD
New Taylor Swift CD
DEVOUR (movie with jensen ackles in it)
that's about it.
lol. i'm so pathetic i know.....
Monday, September 15, 2008
Na na na
Shontelle Lyrics
T-shirt Lyrics
Hey everyone. It is 64* outside. You want a coat but then you’re too hot. So it’s all messed up. It finally stopped raining after 5 days of it. Generally I like rain. But I’ve been sick on and off lately. Finally got over my sore throat only to get stomach cramps from hell. Well, actually we don’t know what they were. At one point my parents wanted to take me to the hospital because they thought I had appendicitis. Or however you spell that. Don’t worry, I don’t. If I did I would probably be dead by now. So I walked here after taking a shower. Really dumb thing to do. All things considered.
And after all this b/s. I get to go hang out with 212* at the HS zombie prison. Just to get a part as a stuck up bitch or a dummy who loves world peace. Either way, they’re easy parts. I don’t even need to speculate anything. It gets boring that way. Plus it’s always a play/musical that no one has ever heard of so they don’t want to see it, or they have heard of it and go “oh god please no WHY?!” when they find out we’re performing it. What is wrong with all these people?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Na Na by Superchick:
You're running a case against me,
Prosector judge and jury,
We´ve had this conversation in your head,
´cause I wasn´t there,you made up what I said,
Or what I would have said,you know me so well,
you heard how I am and how I'm going to heaven knows,
We´ve never had this conversation,or should I be calling it a condemnation,
´cause you're not listening to me.
CHORUS:
So na na na na na,
That´s all I´m gonna say,
´Cause na na na na na,
Made up your mind any way,
na na na na na,
There´s nothing I can do,
so na na na na na,
Couldn´t we be friends if not for you.
I feel like a teacher from Charlie Brown,
All you hear is that wa-wa-wa sound,
Maybe I´m a pokemon, Pikachu,
´cause that what comes out when I´m talking to you,
You're a crusader you´ve made up your fight,
Your Super-hero name is Mr. Right,
Instead of trying to understand,
You show all your friends how wrong I am,
And you´re still not listening to me.
CHORUS
Can´t we be friends,
Why does it end,
Before a word is even heard,
I look at you your attitude,
Why can´t you see,
That it´s not me.
Oops I did it again, I see,
The person I´m talking about is me,
Assuming you the enemy,
In the cross hairs of my verbal uzi,
No matter who wins we both lose,
No matter who starts we both choose,
To keep it going on and on and on and on and on,
But lets start listening and see.
La la la la la,
La la la la la,
Sorry that it got this way,
La la la la la,
Next time I wont let it stew,
La la la la la,
Couldn´t we start over me and you?
Friday, September 12, 2008
My-Oh-My
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Contemplating Suicide
last night was awful. i was crying until just after midnight you know. my sister was being bitchy cuz she didn't get her way. this whole thing started over subtitles if you can believe it... mandy and i argued. mom got into it. i get blamed for every horrible thing that's ever happened so it isn't a shock. then i cried so badly i couldn't breathe and i am still contemplating suicide. wishing i could get the gutts to just do it. but matt said not to and *poked* me online. lol.
you already have what i've got to give. so lets just call it quits. it's just like me to say all of the wrong things that's why i say but what does it take did another girl come make u feel the way i could...
what does it take? anytime u realize that you never really mean what you say.
everyone is such a hypocrite. life bites. does anyone even really want me around? at all?
Monday, September 8, 2008
She Don't Got A Lot To Say
you're gonna miss the girl...
go on and kiss the girl.
now's your moment.
boy you'd better do it soon. no time will be better.
she won't say a word until u kiss the girl.
shalalalalalalalah.
ain't that sad it's such a shame too bad you're gonna miss the girl.
u gotta be prepared go on and kiss the girl.
u wanna kiss the girl.
********************************************************
Girls don't talk about their feelings to their boyfriends for a reason.
They just don't listen and then you feel out-of-season.
Ask her every once in a while
about her day.
go the extra mile
to make her stay.
give her a kiss and tell her u miss her.
that u never stop thinking about her.
don't let her get away.
kiss the girl and make her day.
if she loves u like u love her she will stay.
you don't know why
you want her, it's true.
but go and try,
she loves you too.
don't be shy, don't be bad.
don't lie to her or you'll later be sad.
take the moment and make it happen.
there is no "right moment" until you make it the right one.
don't be shy, don't be scared... kiss the girl in the sun.
or underneath the moon and stars.
it doesn't matter when or where you are...
if you love her... kiss the girl.
i guarantee you, it'll change your whole world.
Don't Miss The Girl...
Kiss The Girl
what a pity. the things he'll never know.
missed out on a whole new world.
man he's gonna be low.
she went and got someone else.
a sweet man.
she kisses but never tells.
cuz she still loves her old boyfriend.
gotta kiss the girl... while u can.
before you become the old boyfriend.
and before she gets a new man.
don't let the fairy tale end.
I Say ROAR!
Nyccie-Mary-Lyn-Me
Went to the Lion's Den.
That's right, Nyccie and I went shopping with our Mothers at the lion's den.
Gas: 6$
Magnets: 8$
Porn: 15$
Nyccie's Expression@The Dildos...: PriceLess...
Friday, August 29, 2008
i have to go
myspace.com/zeeglows
Complaints Of An Ordinary Scale
I am beyond tired at this point. I don’t even know what the hell I’m doing here. The internet is down. And I didn’t think to bring my disks and see if I could update my stories. I feel beyond retarded right now. Oh look it’s a blue font! Isn’t it cool? Yeah, you can tell that I need drugs, huh? I feel like I’m about to pass out on the keyboard. I miss my friends and I wish that there was something to do around here. Maybe I should just go home and watch The Craft. It isn’t like I haven’t seen it a thousand times already. I hope the internet comes back online soon so that I can check my MySpace. I miss talking to Daniel. Besides, I need to tell everyone that my cell is going to be off for a while since I’m so extremely low on time for it. So unless someone’s going to give me about 10$ to get more time… well, we can talk later I suppose. I suppose that I could just mail the letters I’ve written to Danielle. But that would mean walking all the way home again. Oh effin’ joy. Okay I have no clue if the world is actually going to get this blog or not so I may very well be wasting my time. Anyways, it isn’t like anybody reads my blog so who cares right? Oh look, it’s purple! Does anyone even want me to finish my Loserville story?? Or do they just not need to know the ending? Whatever. If anybody actually wants to read some of my finished stories (which are REALLY good) just send me your email address. Or a PO-Box. Whichever is easier for you? Point is, I have some really good stories. In fact, the hard copies of several of them are still being passed around between my friends. To be honest, I’m not sure I’m ever going to get them back. Lol! Yeah I know that this looks like a rainbow and that I do this a lot but I like colors. Besides, it keeps me awake. I mean, it’s not even noon yet and I’ve been up since about 8:30 in the morning. Not fun for a night-owl. I have a headache from hell. It sucks. Great News Everybody! Amanda has agreed to save this for me so that you all can actually read this. YAY! Anyways I’m completely losing my mind. Yeah, I realize I use the term “anyways” a lot. Get over it. I don’t care if you like it or not. I realize also that I can be annoying. Who cares? Oh my goddess, this is really messing with my head. The screen, I mean. The lines and everything. Whoa. Did Juno possess my Word Document? Lol. Just kidding… this is an abnormal blog entry, I think. Oh man I really need to update my deviant art online. Or at least log on. It’s been awhile since I bothered you know. My head is spinning and I feel like I am sick but hey. I’m still here appeasing my readers. What a laugh. It’s almost 11:30 and I’ve been at this for over an hour. Talk about short, right? But the stupid internet is still down. It’s ridiculous. Seriously, no joke. It should be online by now. I’m slowly losing my mind. I may very well actually post this on my official blog instead of just on MySpace. You know? I haven’t done that in a while and apparently they miss me. Who knew? Damn I need something to do. I still need to do up my résumé’. But I don’t really remember how to format it so… anyways. I hope I get a job soon. I need the money in order to move out. I hate this all you know. I hate this town. I hate being stuck here. I hate having no way to college. The whole thing is just a BUST… I should get my meds refilled. But I keep forgetting to go over to the pharmacy. I can be so stupid sometimes. Fatigue is a bitch. And I mean that royally. I can barely keep my eyes open yet I know I received plenty of sleep last night. This is such a joke. I mean it. I hate this so much. I should have ate something before I left. The stupid internet is still down. Grrr! I wish I had a home phone. Then I could talk to Danielle. Yes I still miss her. Get over it. I’ve been friends with her practically my whole life. And since she hates the color pink… Lol. Just teasing Danielle. It’s just too easy. Don’t suppose anyone knows a way I could go to New York? Yeah right. I can’t even get to Battle Creek and that’s about 20 miles north of here. Anyways. I’m losing my mind. Maybe I should type up a letter to Danielle later. At least she’d be able to read it then. My penmanship isn’t exactly nice you know. Lol. My eyes hurt. And they’re dry. Dammed I should have brought my eye drops. I am sure these color changes don’t help any. Lol. Too bad I guess. Anyways. It’s almost noon. Oh the joy! I’m running out of things to babble about. Oh wait. One more thing! My younger brother turns 12 next Tuesday! Nyccie, my friend Nicole, she turns 19 on the same day. Plus, to everyone’s discontent (except mine), everyone starts school that same day. Wow. I managed to type this up in my little sister’s 3 favorite colors. Lol. How sweet is that? I am so out of it right now. It sucks to be a girl sometimes. But on the upside, females are the more intelligent gender. Lol. Just teasing. We’re all equal… blah blah blah.
August 29th, 2008 at 11: 47 A.M. By: Alae McRae